Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
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