i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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