im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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