That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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