Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize
