Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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