I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
