Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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