I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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