You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
