I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize