May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
