I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize