he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize