Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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