my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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