Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
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He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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