people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize
