yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
