dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize