i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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