ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize