i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
