Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Randomize
