Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
