just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
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