So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
My penis needs a shock collar
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
