so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize