You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
