I'm eating all of the evidence.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize