I think I died a long time ago.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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