Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
