Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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