okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
