my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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