If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.