it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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