my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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