So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
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Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
