How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
