I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
