Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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