so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
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