The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
