You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize