Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
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