when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
