I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
