I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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