dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize