I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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